Family meals help kids do better in school

By Katy Smith, parent educator
Winona Early Childhood Family Education

A variety of research studies conclude that the greatest predictor of school success is the family dinner hour.

Among several studies on the topic, Columbia University found that teens who ate dinner with their family were 40 percent more likely to score A’s and B’s than their peers whose families ate separately. You might not know how to help your kids with calculus but if you can make a mean meatloaf, that helps, too!

This was great news for my family and served as evidence enough to start developing mealtime rituals that were warm and inviting. Consider these:

Tune the world out. Answering the phone, texting and watching TV all send a message that your attention is elsewhere. Tuning into the mealtime sent a message that the kids and our time together was our No. 1 priority.
Start the meal with a "opener" or by lighting candles. A ritual helps kids transition into the mealtime.
Invite conversation! The dinner table is a great place for sharing your day, telling stories and keeping the family up-to-date with schedules. If your family is struggling to keep the conversation flowing, get inspired by a book or table talk cards. Practice speaking one at a time and really listening to one another (even if the 6-year-old is fond of telling the same knock-knock joke for months).
Model and encourage manners but focus on the time together. No one wants to be judged too harshly at mealtime. If you want kids to look forward to mealtime, provide a casual atmosphere. Even in the years that our family dinner looked much like feeding time at the petting zoo, I always kept the end goal in mind. I had faith that someday, they will eat like civilized human beings with whom I would be proud to share a meal.
Respect the cook! No one wants to be a short order cook. Make one meal with plenty of choices on the table so each family member will find something they like. If you love stroganoff and know the kids will shudder, make sure to serve it with applesauce, carrots and bread. I have never met a kid who didn’t like dipping. Ranch dressing and ketchup are essential condiments at a happy family table. Try not to judge what they dip or how often they do.
Get to know and love the crock pot. You'll enjoy peace of mind during the day knowing your meal is already done. The hairiest time of the day in any family comes when we are trying to transition into the house after a long day while trying to get a meal going. Treat yourself to some crock pot bliss.
Thanks for coming! Even when the meal didn’t go well, it is important to acknowledge that everyone made an effort to be there. Having a quiet, happy mealtime takes practice, lots of practice. Looking back, it is a commitment that has had lasting benefits and family mealtime is a great way to strengthen the home/school partnership.

Bon appetit!

Katy Smith has been a parent educator since 1996 in Winona.

February 23, 2009