Communicating with parents is one of the most important things we do as teachers. When we work together with a child’s parents, we improve the atmosphere for learning. Conferences are a way to build a good teacher-parent partnership.

In preparing for conferences, be ready to answer questions parents are likely to ask, such as: What is my child's ability level, and is he or she working up to it? How is my child doing in specific subjects? Does he or she have any specific gifts? Does he or she cause any trouble?

Here are some other tips to help make your parent conferences productive and successful.

• Invite both parents. However, be sensitive to the fact that many students are from non-traditional families. Many children live with grandparents, foster parents, step parents, older siblings, or other adults.  You could unwittingly hurt a child’s feelings by always asking to meet the “mother” or the “father.”
• Make contact with parents early in the year, perhaps with a memo or newsletter sent home to all pupils. Give parents an outline of what their children will be studying, and let them know you will be happy to meet with them during the year. Be sure to say how and when they may contact you for conferences.
• Allow enough time for the meeting. Twenty to 30 minutes is usually adequate. If you are scheduling back-to-back conferences, be sure to allow enough time between them (10 minutes or so) so you can make necessary notes on the just-concluded conference and prepare for the upcoming one.
• Get your papers organized in advance. Assemble your grade book, test papers, samples of the student’s work, attendance records and other pertinent data ahead of time.
• Greet parents near the entrance they will use. You will alleviate anxiety and frustration about finding your room and you'll make parents feel welcome.
• If students are included in your district’s conferences, be sure to involve them in the discussions.
• Get the names right. Don’t assume that Jennifer Peabody’s mother is Mrs. Peabody. Check your records ahead of time. Don't assume that the wrinkled gray-haired gentleman coming in with Johnny is his grandfather - politely ask.
• Avoid physical barriers. Don’t sit behind your desk while forcing parents to squeeze into a student desk. Arrange conference-style seating if possible so you will all be equals.
• Open conferences on a warm, upbeat note to get everyone relaxed. Start with a positive statement about the student’s abilities, work or interests.
• Structure the session, but leave flexibility for concerns or questions parents want to discuss. As soon as the parents arrive, review the structure of the conference so you will both have a clearly defined agenda.
• Be specific in your comments. Instead of saying, “She doesn’t accept responsibility,” pin down the problem by pointing out, “Amanda had a whole week to finish her book report, but she only wrote two paragraphs.”
• Suggest a specific course of action. If Jane is immature, you might suggest that her parents give her a list of weekly chores, allow her to take care of a pet, or give her a notebook to write down her assignments. Of course, make it clear these are just suggestions.
• Avoid education jargon that might confuse parents.
• Turn the other cheek. In routine parent conferences, it is unusual to run into abusive or hostile parents, but it can happen. Try not to be rude, whatever the provocation. Listen to parents calmly, without getting defensive.
• Ask for parents’ opinions and listen carefully to their answers. Ask if there is anything you should know about the child, such as study habits, relationships with siblings or important events that may affect schoolwork.
• Emphasize strengths. It is very easy for parents to feel defensive, since many of them see themselves in their children. You will help if you review the child’s strengths and areas of need, rather than dwelling on criticism or stressing weaknesses.
• Focus on solutions rather than problems.
• Stress collaboration. “I’d like to discuss with you how we might work together to improve John’s study habits” gets the relationship off on the right foot. Let parents know you are eager to work with them throughout the year to help make their child’s education positive and successful.
• Don’t judge. Parents' values may be very different from your own, but communicating your judgments of parents’ attitudes or behaviors can be a roadblock to a productive relationship.
• Before the conference ends, summarize the discussion and what actions you and the parents have decided to take.
• Conclude the discussion on a positive note. When you can, save at least one encouraging comment or positive statement about the student for the end of the conference. If you need more time, arrange another meeting.
• Keep a record of the conference, including suggestions for improvement. Make notes as soon as possible after the conference, while details are fresh. Maintain a separate file for each student.
  Throughout the year, record information regarding your communication with the student’s parents. Regularly review the files to determine when followup communication is needed.